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@Havret sorry forgot to tag you
I am no expert but due to the lack of responses I'll chip in my two cents ;)
What you are describing is more or less what I would, except maybe persisting different events for the manager - with just the info it needs.
An alternative approach would be to build a projection of the ChatActor's events only based on the two events you are interested in. This way you would not persist another pair of events and only start those children that are still ongoing.
Yet another approach would be to use Cluster Sharding backed by Persistence that can restore your actors when they migrate between shards, but that would not survive a system-wide crash and would require you to use this distributed-centric system, which I am not sure if it's applicable in your environment.